Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday #2
I suck at teaching my son his ABCs
Actually I pretty much suck at getting him to do ANYTHING.
On most days, I feel at a loss when it comes to him.
He laughs when I tell him to put his toys away.
He demands that you find him his blankie.
He will NOT GO TO BED before 10pm even though he can’t read time and has been up since 6am without a nap.
And he’s trained his little sister to take off his shoes for him when they come home from our daily walk. If I don’t stand there and watch him do it, I return to find Natasha taking it off for him. And when I say, Tash, Damian can do that himself, she says “But Damian nice. Damian give me ______ (cookie/train/car/candy) or Damian will (play with me/dance with me/share toys with me). He knows how to charm and bribe.
But my biggest struggle and the one that stresses me the most, is getting him to learn.
I love that he likes counting. And singing.
Really bloody loud.
But, Alphabet, no.
Reading time, only if it’s new.
Colors, maybe, sometimes. He actually knows them, but when he gets tired of you asking him what color is the train, the duck, this banana, he’ll answer you with slick answers, such as “red with white circles” when the train is blue all over and “that’s not a duck that’s a fire truck” and “banana? what banana?”
Getting my 3 girls to read, draw, learn their alphabet was/is super easy. They were/are eager to learn everything. Natasha isn’t 3 yet but can recognize half of the alphabet. The teens have 98.5 and 98.4 GPAs.
With Damian, whatever I can get into a 15 minute block of time, is all I’ll get. I’m not allowed to teach him the alphabet for more than 15 minutes. It’s like he’s got an internal stop watch. Once it hits that 15 minute mark, he says ok mommy, that’s enough. And A is for everything. A is for apple, A is for Ball, A is for cat.
And unless the books are for drawing on, he wants no part in them. I say it’s story time, he asks where’s the remote.
I’m absolutely sucking at this.
He’ll be 4 in August and we missed the registration date for pre-k. Not from me not trying, I can tell you that. Department of Ed gave me the wrong month. They said registration was in May. So mid-April I show up at the one school in our neighborhood that offers 2 pre-k classes, consisting of 30 kids each, to find I’d just miss registration day by 3 days. No exceptions. Called Dept. of Ed again, they were sorry I was misinformed and they couldn’t help me.
SO…I’ve got one more year to teach him what he needs to know for Kindergarten.
This shouldn’t stress me out. My teens didn’t have the Pre-K option because our neighborhood didn’t offer it and yet they went into Kindergarten knowing how to read and how to add and subtract.
I know it’s just the way I’m approaching it.
I thought the flash cards were cool. He likes the number pack but not the alphabet pack.
I though the foam letter puzzle was cool, I mixed them up, gave him 3 and asked him which was A. I told him if he got it right, he could put it back into the puzzle. He did get 5/8 right, but then got bored. Now I can’t find the letters and when i asked, he said he put them away. When I ask why, he said “no more learning time, you bad girl mommy, you mix up the letters”.
We have a gazillion books and he won’t let me re-read one. If I pull it out of the shelf, he says no, we read and he covers his ears. Every single time until yesterday.
Yesterday, Damian received a package in the mail. I told him it was for him.
He carried it up the stairs and tore open the yellow envelope to find a dino book from Pragmaticmom. ( i won it in one of her many giveaways. she knows books and gives away the coolest books ever.)
Not only was it a dino book, it was about dinos and cookies.
I’ve read that book 8 times in the past 24 hours and Damian slept with the book last night and at naptime today and took the book outside with him on our walks both days.
Yep, I’m approaching this wrong.
So wrong I’m sucking at it.
I’ve gone so far as to ask the doc if he could have ADHD.
Pediatrician laughed and said Damian is super friendly and already has a quick wit from what he can tell from their visits. He said 3 and 4 year old boys are pretty playful, more so than girls, and he just may not be ready for structure yet and so his attention span seems short.
I’m hoping his interest in this book is a new beginning or a cue that he’s ready for more.
It definitely has me thinking my choice in books and learning activities for a boy just sucks.
I taught my son the alphabet by fishing for letters. We used magnetic letters and a magnetic fishing pole. He fished for letters, stuck them on a magnetic board and then identified and/or sorted them. 15 minutes a day for a few months. Try that. I have a post here:
http://www.pragmaticmom.com/2012/05/learning-read-picture-books-magnetic-alphabet-letters/
PragmaticMom recently posted..Slow Dance. A Poem and Request from a Dying Girl. THIS IS A HOAX.
have i told you you’re bloody brilliant. we have the magnetic letters and a magnetic fishing pole!
thank you darlin!
Vanita Cyril recently posted..Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday #2
Your son is beautiful! I don’t think you suck at all, all kids are different and learn in different ways. He sounds very smart, too smart for his own good in fact – haha! He’ll probably do great in school, I’m glad he is loving the dino book. Sounds like math class may be a favorite for him too
Anna recently posted..Saturday Confessions – Self Pitty and Passing Weather
he is too smart for his own good, sometimes too smart for me! thank you for the encouragement mama!
Getting books in the mail and especially about dinosaurs and cookies…what us better than that? Pragmatic Mom is my go-to for kids books, too.
Capability recently posted..Keeping Cool, Day 103…A light lunch
yep, PragmaticMom is a wonderful resource!
Discovery Toys has some amazing children’s books, also, not to mention great toys that help kids get smarter.
Vanita, I read that you’re looking for another income producing gig. DT offers that, too. Some of your mommy readers may be seeking that as well. Check it out!
You don’t suck at all! I love the idea that Pragmatic Mom suggested. I actually saw something similar on Pinterest and want to give it a try! It sounds like fun!
Jessica recently posted..Choosing a Camera: What to Look for in a DSLR
it is fun! we did it last night. we had a magnetic fishing pole left over from a fishing game and i had magnetic letters hidden away during natasha’s put everything in her mouth phase. we did it for 15 minutes before our bedtime book, which of course was the dino book!
Vanita Cyril recently posted..Too Hot For Weight Loss? Retrofit has your back
Oh friend…
I know.
Thank you so much for writing this. You don’t even know how much stress I am feeling because my son is a hard ass when it comes to learning and I don’t have any patience to make him.
It is maddening. I really don’t want to send him to Jk (it’s your pre K in USA) because they are still so small. But I can’t teach him.
If it’s any consolation, my girlfriend is a JK teacher and she tells me not to worry about it. You have to remember that these are babies entering school. They’re not einstiens…did I even spell his name right? LOL.
Kimberly recently posted..Secret Mommy-hood Confession Saturday
i forgot to mention during our little twitter convo, when i feel i’m at the end of my rope with damian, i just stop for the day and have dad do it the next day. and i leave the room so i don’t feel like taking over since his tactics are different from mine.
like u said, they’re still babies. they’ll learn. us stressing it doesn’t help, just makes us more worried. hugs to you girlie!
Vanita Cyril recently posted..Too Hot For Weight Loss? Retrofit has your back
I SO can relate, Vanita! My son will be starting K same time as your son and no interest in the alphabet! In fact he has a mental block with the alphabet song even! My daughter, same as you daughters. Entered K reading, etc. Part of me thinks I just didn’t work enough with him and the other part of be thinks he is just not ready or interested yet and NOT to push. Definitely harder to find books he likes. We spend a lot of time looking a pics and reading captions in books about Star Wars, etc. I go wild when he demonstrates any scholarly interest though! He has a little more the typical boy/engineering/science related interests. I do want him to be prepared for school though!
So glad he has a book he likes!!! That could be the breakthrough for you. My son really liked one we took out this week called There Are Cats in This Book. Maybe we are turning a corner!
girl damian can sing twinkle twinkle little star word for word but barely gets the ABC song. i feel you girl. i feel you. i’m sure we’re turning a corner. we’ll make it!
Vanita Cyril recently posted..Too Hot For Weight Loss? Retrofit has your back
Vanita, let me tell you, you’re not alone.
I’m feeling like a total failure when it comes to teaching my 2 1/2 year old anything. I still try though. He loves numbers so that’s not a problem. He knows some colors (through painting) and some animals, and even some letters of the alphabet. But dude, he’s not really talking properly. His enunciation of some words is pretty atrocious. And it’s not that he’s stupid. He’s just bloody stubborn and won’t do things unless it’s HIS way. Sigh.
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lol you sound like you’re channeling me. lmao. damian didn’t speak properly until he turned 3. and even now he has trouble with new words, but he picks them up the more we use them. but sarcasm? he has not trouble learning that. boys…i tell ya girl. natasha has been talking since 1.75 but then again she’s such a chatter box…omg. ya can’t win. lol. no worries girl. he’ll be awesome. you’ll see. damian is also a bloody chatterbox now too.
Vanita Cyril recently posted..Too Hot For Weight Loss? Retrofit has your back
Oh my gosh! I couldn’t get anything done but kissing his cheeks! Look at that face!
My second child (Violet) is brilliant, but has absolutely no inclination to learn anything. So I (mistakenly) assume she isn’t learning. Then she does something and completely surprises me. So I’m taking a more passive route in teaching her because she just doesn’t respond with the same kids of drive Milo did at that age. I just have to keep reminding myself that every child is different.
Milo looked at letter and reading as a puzzle. Violet knows the letters by learning her friend’s names (K is for Kara, etc.). She has to have some sort of emotional attachment to the concept before she gets it. So different…
IASoupMama recently posted..The Massacre
girl, i can’t get damian to remember D is for damian. i’ve tried, i’ve tried. lol. yep, i’ve always said every child is different, i just didn’t realize how different. :/
I can tell you that quick wit comes from you V. LOL He’s definitely your son
Just remember when things are tough that everything happens for a reason; you missed registration for a reason. Whether it be so you can teach him and he can be more prepared for next year, or whether he just wasn’t ready period, it happened the way it was supposed to happen.
As for his learning, have you thought to use games to help? Or perhaps bribery? Hey, when it comes to learning, bribery can work. LOL
Kayla recently posted..$200 Amazon Blast FREE Blog Opportunity
yep, everything does happen for a reason. i trully believe that one. thanks for all your support girl. big hugs to you!
man oh man, thaz a cute kid. screw his abc’s … let him be cute for a little while longer. he’s got the gene pool to be brilliant, what’s the rush? let him be. ABCs will happen, unavoidable in your home.
kathykate recently posted..Summertime Daughter Grows Up
thank you mama. that dino book sparked something in him. now he asks me for learning time. i was so shocked i could have peed on myself.