The Man Behind The Woman
Sometimes I’ve got to sit here…
look at what I’ve been doing this past two years
look at how I’ve been growing
the things I’ve been achieving
the fact that i do it all while still raising my kids
and i wonder how did i get so lucky
as to marry this man.
did God just look down on me and say
“V, you’ve struggled enough on your own,
here’s some support”?
When the Winds of Change came along, I had no clue my life would change like this.
I knew it was about to get better, I just didn’t realize how much so.
Because of this man, I’m able to follow my dreams.
I’m able to watch my children grow, build beautiful memories.
I’m able to grow as an entrepreneur.
I’m having this kick ass time teaching this course.
I’ve made incredible friends online.
I’m actually learning to cook.
Because of him, I know what it means to be loved.
Because of him, I know what it means to not shoulder it all alone.
To not worry that there’s no one to fall back on.
Of all the people who’ve ever been directly connected to my life, he is the one who cheers me on and encourages me to take risks.
He doesn’t try to change my path, he supports me in finding my path.
Sure friends have cheered me on, watched my back.
But no one is as directly affected by my choices as him, and yet, he empowers me to make those choices.
So many have told me I should go back to work – ya know, like i’m not working now – get the financial security of a paycheck.
I’m sorry, how secure is it for me to rely on someone else to keep paying me?
And though we’ve had moments where we struggle and though we are pinching pennies now, due to my need to fly, we’re happy, our kids are happy and my little business here and this little blog continues to thrive.
Tonight, as I put together Exercise 5 for my class, as i sit here with my hair tied in this messy bun, exhausted and feeling sick, ratty old pjs, hubby asks me, why I’m not in the video I’m making.
I look at him and ask “Have you looked at me tonight?”
He gives me this authentic lost wtf are you talking about look.
Love is bloody blind I tell you.
This man finds me beautiful always.
Even when I’m at my lowest.
Even when I haven’t combed my hair in 2 days.
This man looks at me and sees this woman he married 6 years ago.
The one who was always perfectly groomed.
Never at her wit’s end from chasing toddlers.
Always fully rested.
Twenty pounds lighter.
He still sees me as he saw me then.
Because even then, he saw inside me.
Not the outer wrapping and not the high paying job.
This is why now, though both are not as glamorous as before, he still loves me.
Because he loved ME.
He encourages me to be who I am, to take risks, to find my own path, to grow into who I want to be and he keeps loving me as much as he did before, maybe even more now.
He keeps supporting me and empowering me.
And today, I couldn’t be me without him.