Why I Will Not Comment On “Big Blogs” Anymore
I read a really awesome post this morning over at Mama Wants This where Alison talks about the lack of commenting. Now I’ve got to tell you, I love Alison’s writing voice and I’ve been reading her blog on and off for a bit, but I never would comment because she does have a good volume of comments on her posts. Seeing the number count deterred me in the past from commenting. I’ll be truthful here, I never commented before because I didn’t expect her to respond.
Yes, I know, when you assume shit you make an ass out of blah blah blah.
But recently I read a post that I had to comment on and when I looked at the comments section, I realized Alison does respond to comments. I know it sounds stupid, but I sat there thinking about why I stopped commenting on most blogs and the fact that she responds to her readers encouraged me to start again.
Which I did this weekend and that taught me that not all bloggers are created equal.
Are your comments worth publishing?
I read a lot of “big blogs”. When I first started reading them, I would leave comments but never get a response. I soon learned that my comments need to MEAN something. They needed to benefit the conversation somehow. Ok, I get that. But if you’ve read the post and have had nothing to add except a compliment for the great post, is it better to not leave the comment or to show the blogger support?
I always prefer the support, ya’ know, in case you were interested, though i’m in no way a big blog. However, if you’re an internet marketer looking for a link back, you can go screw yourself.
So these days I only leave comments on “big blogs” when i have a question or something to share that relates. If i feel the post is really good, I’ll tweet it.
Am I pissed when I still get no response?
Blogger’s Rights
The fact of the matter is, it’s their blog and they can do what the hell they want.
- Blogger have the right to not publish your comment.
- They have a right to moderate your comment and with wordpress being so flexible, they can change your comment too.
- Some big blogs get so much spam that they don’t check their spam box and sometimes that’s where you comment can go.
- Many bloggers of big blogs don’t have the time to respond to everyone. As a matter of fact, a food blogger told me that a few weeks ago on twitter. She said she doesn’t have time to respond to readers.
Reader’s Rights
So…the blogger has rights. We all understand that.
What about the reader’s rights?
If the reader has gone to the extent to take time out of their busy day to leave you a comment, whether it be a question, a story that relates or encouragement…
do they not have the right to get a response?
as long as it’s not troll-like or something that insults the blog or the other readers, do they not have the right to their comment being published?
What is the Comment Section For?
isn’t the comments section for interaction?
or is it just for social proof that you have comments?
i always thought it was a place to bounce ideas, support your fellow blogger, and build your community.
maybe i’m bloody wrong.
What constitutes a blog as being a “big blog”?
Literally, I have no clue.
Is any blog really a “big blog”?
Considering that in comparison to other blogs, they could really be little?
In my view, a “big blog” is one with a huge readership, authority and is really really really well known.
Why I won’t be commenting on blogs that are considered big.
Pre Alison’s Blog:
A year ago, I left a comment on fairly well read blog. It was a good post and a reader had left a comment. Since I had something to share that was directly related to the reader’s comment, I replied to her comment. I figured both the reader and the blogger would receive the notification of my comment.
My comment was never published.
I understand it being held for moderation since I was a new reader and it was my first comment. But i had genuine and helpful info to share so I wrote a comment.
So I left a comment on their next post. I checked both posts for days. Never published.
Now, it’s a blogger’s right to pick and choose what comments they publish.
Maybe the blogger doesn’t agree with your comment.
Maybe the blogger doesn’t like you.
Ok fine.
But I never returned to the blog again. Why? Because coincidentally when they did respond to that reader, the response was very similar to the one i made.
Maybe it’s just great minds thinking alike. Maybe my comment just got lost in the spam box. who the hell knows? what irks me is that i took the time to leave a comment that was well thought out and helpful and it was a waste of my time.
There’s another blogger that I visited before she blew up and became “the shit”. She has about 50 comments per post now and doesn’t respond to anyone who’s as little as me. Meaning, all the big names, blogger known every fuggin where, get a reply, but I’ve noticed that a few others that never went “Big” including myself, don’t get a response. Only time i hear from that chic now is when her comment count is low.
Now, Post Alison’s Blog:
Over the weekend I left a comment on a very freakin well known blog. The post was a weekend project fix your blog’s seo. No response. Today is Thursday. As a matter of fact, no response to anyone. Interaction my ass.
Yesterday I left a comment on another well known blog in the mommy blogs community. My comment was published. I actually asked a question of the guest blogger to see what she suggested. The guest post was about moving from blogger to wordpress and I shared my thoughts and asked a question. I checked back yesterday to see if there was any response to my question and i found that someone had left a comment that i disagreed with. The reader had said something along the lines of you owning your comment once your domain is pointing to blogger and how moving to wordpress is a waste. well, you know me, i responded. I responded with a big comment letting the reader know that even though they own their content, Blogger owns the server space and can take their blog down at anytime. I then shared info from the post I did on moving from Blogger to WordPress. The comment did include a link. But not to me. To the guy I quoted in the comment. I guess because i added the link there to give the guy credit, my comment was held for moderation. Cool, I understand.
I checked back this morning, no response to my question from the guest blogger, though other comments after mine received a response. My response to that other blogger was never published. Which is cool, since I screwed up by adding a link.
I’m just glad that the reader was responded to by the guest blogger. With a response similar to mine.
Great minds think alike, right?
So here is today’s take away. yes, today, I’m giving you a bloody take away.
Alison is awesome.
Don’t assume shit.
You can pick and choose who’s blog you’ll invest your time in.
Your fuggin BIG BLOG would be nothing, NOTHING without readers. Show ‘em some respect and gratitude for taking time out of their busy life to leave you a comment. If your guest blogger is too busy or overlooks them, bloody nudge them to respond.
I won’t be deterred from leaving comments, but I will be avoiding blogs that have burned me and I will not return once burned.
Have you been burned?
art: © Dana S. Rothstein – Fotolia.com and © igor – Fotolia.com
Omigosh, thank you for the shoutout and your kind words!!
I always respond to comments when I can. To me, commenting is the life blood of blogging. And it’s both ways – readers commenting, and blogger commenting on comment.
It is disheartening when you leave a comment, and the blogger doesn’t even reply, or worse, in your case, doesn’t even publish it. If it’s not trolling, why not publish it? I don’t understand that.
I read a post once that basically said, if you read someone’s post then leave without commenting, it’s rude. She also made a point to say that some people only comment to benefit from HER traffic (because she has commentluv installed). She went on to say that she makes it a point to respond and visit back. I commented by politely disagreeing, saying that sometimes, people don’t comment because they may not have the time, they’re reading from their phone, they don’t have anything to add etc. And guess what? She did not reply to my comment nor did she visit me back. So now, who’s rude?
Great thought provoking post, Vanita!
Alison recently posted..This Is About Blogging . . . Sort Of
girl, u are welcome, your blog rocks. your blog was on my mind when i started writing so you naturally became a part of the post. the only comments i don’t publish are from internet marketers. and i don’t assume when it comes to that, i always follow their link back before responding if i’m not familiar with them. i love commentluv because it keeps me updated on my readers new posts and helps me to meet new bloggers. the premium version has also been wicked for spam and trackbacks – nasty buggers those trackbacks. they cause all kinds of crawl errors. story for another day. and you’re right, a lot of times i’m reading from this silly android and it’s not so bloody smart so my comments tend to go poof and i give up. lol.
Awesome post! I love to interact with my readers! If I get a comment, I’m replying. Mind you, I don’t have a huge reader base either but I feel if the reader took that time to comment, I MUST take the time to reply. Common courtesy imo. Some of the bigger blogs and some small, I’ve found… don’t reply or they are chosey who they reply too. The blogger world is rough. They way I see it, if I have a handful of readers that comment on my posts and I can interact and get to know them, I’m doing my job well.
Brend recently posted..Now is not the time
Bren, you’re damn right! some are choosey who they reply to.
I had a bloggy friend who I actually considered a friend. i did care for her and we talked on the phone a couple of times and were really supportive to each other. but i found the only times she was supportive of me was when my blog was hopping. like today, with all the comments, she would be all over this. so really it was me being more supportive than her. when she was MIA for a couple of days i’d text her to check in on her, i’d listen to her doubts and encourage her.
i tried to comment on all of her posts, even though she immediately responded to bloggers that she considered to be elite while my response sat for days not answered until she had a new post up. i still thought of her as a friend, and i went out of my way to help her with a new project and then she wrote a post where she kissed the asses of these “elite” bloggers she once gossiped about. after that, i unsubscribed. i unfollowed. it broke my heart.
this blogging is a personal affair no matter what anyone says. being choosey will be noticed. taking advantage of someone without showing appreciation will be noticed.
the blogger world is rough.
hugs to you girl and thanks for stopping by. i truly appreciate you.
Oh you are soooo right! It’s almost like a high school clique. The popular girls versus the nerds. Last time I checked I was an adult and beyond the piddle bs. Wth is wrong with some ppl? I have to say, some of my readers have come and gone but several have stuck around through all my changes. These are ppl I talk to on twitter and have allowed into my fb world. These are the ones who are there through thick and thin. Very few of em, but I appreciate them most.
Your blog rocks girlie! If someone doesn’t like it, screw em. It’s there loss. I might not always comment, but always reading.
the fuggin click business makes me crazy. i’ve got my girls from back in the days and they’ve stuck by me and they are my support and i love them dearly. and how did we get together? i create a commenting group and girl that pulled us together. some slipped away but some stood strong and i love them to death. and as much as i hate FB i really do use it for those i’m closest to and i only accept invites from those who i can tell i’m pmsing and share my kids’ pics. people i feel won’t be bothered by it. i turn down invites, not because i don’t like these people, but because there’s only so many people who will put up with me talking about cramps and dirty laundry piling up. LOL
i’m so glad we connected girl. love your blog too and i read by email. i love the picks of titan!
Vanita recently posted..Why These People Are Not My Bloggy Friends
LMAO I hear ya gf! Blog out those crampy pms’ing rants! I love em!
I do have a few “big blogs” I read that I don’t bother to comment on no matter how much I love the content. Why? I just feel my comment won’t be seen with so many other comments on the same post. I also have issues with commenting on any blog post (big or little) when I have to fill out captcha. It annoys me. Get a spam blocker & call it a day people. I, myself, have very few readers. I’m ok with that. (Not to say I don’t want more but, I’d rather have quality readers than a quantity of readers) I try very hard to make sure I comment back to each comment I receive. They took the time to comment, they deserve my respect of acknowledgement. Oh, and when I do get a reply on a comment I leave or a comment on my post from certain people, I get very giddy!!!
Mimzy Wimzy recently posted..Perplexed
Ha ha
Yep I’ve been burned few times. We all do at first ’cause we put faith on ‘em. I just saw your tweet on my twitter stream and stared at it for few seconds thinking “What’s she suggesting?”. So right away I landed here and read your article integrated with whole bunch of experiences. Now it’s my time 
Once I read an article about “Why commenting is important” (Not the topic though). There the author suggests all commentators should be respected with a reply. Really interesting. Same time I imagined how brilliant the author is. But… When I scroll through comments section, no reply @ all. How bad he is in action. huh?
I agree with you, Vanita. I wanna ask such Bloggers “If someone takes time to stop by and leave a comment, why don’t you just show some respect? ‘Cause you are the genius and wrote it out for the sake of readers? Readers MUST leave a comment in return? That’s what’s on your mind?”. Sometimes they may busy or no time to reply for all of them. Then he should take an alternative to respond or prevent heartaches. BTW if someone spamming around with promotional links or abusing comments, then I won’t bear ‘em. Else for others, eventhough they won’t come back to see a reply, we should be fair enough and respect + value their ideas and compliments. Also I do check back posts where I left comments earlier for replies.
Some Bloggers just take advantage of commentators ideas. It happens almost everywhere. They wanna become mentors. No.. no… they don’t wanna become mentors. They wanna show off as mentors.
I think no one will ignore comments made on their blogs if they have big hearts
And if you do reply for comments made on your blog, then… You know what I mean 
Have a great day
Really enjoyed it.
Cheers…
Mayura recently posted..Schedule and Maximize the Impact of Your Tweets with Timely
Mayura! Thanks for stopping by sweetie. I love your post on Timely and have to check it out. I’m so glad my tweet pulled you in. commenting takes a lot of time and i appreciate everyone who takes the time to leave a comment. sometimes i can’t reply until later in the day, but i still reply. without comments, my blog would be nothing. NOTHING. and i know what kind of posts you’re referring to. i’ve seen many of them where bloggers try to push you to comment by reminding you to comment but not responding to your comment. it’s as if they want the comment for social proof and that’s it. blogging, in my opinion, is a great way to build a community, a great way to get to know people, it’s a beautiful way to get your voice heard and have fun. can you do all these things by yourself, without comments? i’d like to see someone try. it may work for a while, but people smarten up and get tired of it. a blog can be run like a business, but it can’t be impersonal because you’re dealing with people. people with feelings. some bloggers forget that. i love it when bloggers who blog about blogging forget that.
Sometimes I leave comments that go ignored. I try not to take it personally — unless the comment I leave is one of three. And then I think, huh?
I reply to all of my comments (at least I hope I do), but sometimes I reply by email — usually for someone I consider a friend, and sometimes by comment. It depends on the situation, so it might look like I didn’t replay, but in reality I took it to email.
Honestly, I keep up with blogs that interact with mine and me. And that’s enough for me to do right now.
IASoupMama recently posted..The Moment a Mother is Born: Redhead Reverie
see i don’t mind not getting a response when i leave a supportive comment. but when i take the time to write a comment, like yours, i like to at least get a thanks for stopping by. sheesh. what really pisses me off is when i try to help build engagement by asking a Q and i’m ignored or even not published. what pissed me off about this last try is that my first comment on the same post was published, question never answered and my response to someone else’s comment went poof and replaced by a comment similar to mine. i reached out to a blogger who offered similar services to mine and asked her a public question that may make me look not as pro as her by asking, but i did it anyway, because as a colleague she will probably know things i don’t. and NOTHING. that pisses me off. eh screw it. lol.
Well, I sincerely appreciate all that you do! Count me as a fan always!
IASoupMama recently posted..The Moment a Mother is Born: Redhead Reverie
you’re just too sweet girl. thank you. and when i said “you” i meant you in general not you specific. lol
i’ve had that twice. and i got a S.O.B. from a fave big blogger. there are a lot of choices today, and i won’t stop reading, but i won’t invest time where i don’t even get included on a mass thank u or even a tweet saying thanks.
Hi Vanita.
I believe that comments are important, because they are some sort of conformation that people ARE reading your posts. I NOW believe that comments should be informative and add value to the post.
Or be challenging to the writer. “Great Post!” does not suffice anymore.
Great Post!
JanB recently posted..Profanity in Blogs
“I NOW believe that comments should be informative and add value to the post.” eh, i don’t. i think a comment showing support is just as good and i always appreciate them.
Vanita recently posted..Friday Blogger Follow: Moms Who Flash
I second that!
Vidya Sury recently posted..An Interview At BlogAdda
Dawd, you’re hard to please…
Challenging and add value. you’re right. Getting comments and interaction on your blog post is a form of a reward or confirmation that the reader is interested. I don’t mind getting comments that are not all ‘wonderful and praising me into heaven’, know what I mean?
JanB recently posted..Use Word Cloud for SEO
I usually don’t care a rat’s backside whether the blog is big or not. Let’s face it, if it weren’t for commenters/readers/visitors/lurkers and now sharers – size wouldn’t come into the picture – I mean, nobody’d even know they existed. If the post appeals, I always comment when I have something worthwhile to say. (And I am under the delusion that I always have something worthwhile to say
(wow, those emoties were beckoning to me and I just had to click one!).
Then, there are blogs I am fond of and will make it a point to comment on every single post and share. (like this one). If I met them late (like this one), I’ll go into the archives and get to know them better. Because, with some bloggers (like this one) it is love at first sight.
But. I do feel bad when some bloggers don’t care a dog’s dangler to acknowledge, no matter what. I find that rather strange behavior, even though i don’t keep score. Odd, that. And yes, I’ve had it happen to me – a comment not being published – and what’s funnier, the blogger posting it as their own. Comic eh? But I guess that’s what it is all about for most folks. The desperation for reciprocation is also odd – there are totally unrelated people who wouldn’t give a kitten’s cuss about my blog, but will come over and say – “very good post. please visit my blog and leave a comment” and actually post their link there.
I didn’t know WordPress allows you to edit a comment. How cool. Blogger doesn’t have that and I wish it did.
Because I could certainly do without complimentary penis rings, you know.
I totally understand the mood of your post. Not having time for readers is, in my book, weird. Where is the logic? Long ago, I knew a blogger who would expect me to comment on every post – yet would be snooty about visiting mine. Later, I came to know that my content did not meet with approval.
I write about whatever I feel like – and right then, I wrote about the benefits of cursing, my experience with sanitary napkins and all sorts of topics that everyone else did not seem to mind. Oh okay, there were barely any comments, but them most of my readers are not the commenting type. I’ve never self-promoted because to me, the whole point of my blog was not that. But I found it funny that this blogger was worried about not looking good, being associated with my blog. Some friend, eh?
Anyway ~ different strokes for different folks, I guess. It is interesting to see different shades of behavior and how most people won’t give unless they know what they’re getting. C’est la vie.
You’re a real doll, Vanita. I love your writing style.
Vidya Sury recently posted..An Interview At BlogAdda
you win the award for the best bloody comment i’ve ever read anywhere. seriously. you kill me girl and i love your blog too and thank you for the compliments. those smilies are crazy, aren’t they? lol. not only does wordpress allow you to edit the comment, you can remove the link so no backlink for the spammer and since i have comment luv, it will allow me to remove the comment luv link too.wicked, huh? girlie, if you ever decide to move to wordpress self hosted, i’d design you a site for free.
Wow…you would? I’ve been considering (with lots of people advising me – i really mean pushing me) – moving from Blogger to WordPress self-hosted – but I am scared shitless about the procedure. I am afraid to step out of the Blogger comfort zone which is so easy to handle – I’ve been doing it for ten years now. I justify it in my mind, telling myself that since I don’t sell anything via my blog, it is okay. And I actually think it is. A somewhat lax attitude (as I’ve been told over and over
).
Guess what? I fantasized about someone coming forward and offering to look after the whole thing for me.
So – I am grinning like a cat who’s got a little rat trapped by the tip of its tail, while the rat is under the illusion that it is actually free. Chee. I am a budding creep.
When you say “design you a site” did you imply taking care of the process? I’ve heard people fretting over the “Google juice” they’ve built and losing all the comments they’ve received so far and sites being hijacked and all sorts of things. Not to mention the expenditure of setting it all up and maintaining it. What are your views? If you’ve written about it, point me to the link. I am going to be sweating over some rather tedious writing work today. But next week, I plan to lurk a lot here.
(because you write the way I speak and I love it!)
Vidya Sury recently posted..An Interview At BlogAdda
lol omg i should have clarified. when i said design it, i meant the actual design, not the transfer. however i can do the transfer, it’s just a long process and i charge for that sucker, but i’m sure we can work something out. next week i am moving a fav blogger and she’s been on Blogger for years and we’re already in the process. we’re hoping to finalize next week. after moving, you can see what she says about the move. as for being afraid to move to a new platform, here’s what i’ll do for you. i have a set of videos that you can download that teach WP 101. I didn’t create them myself but they were an investment i was happy to make to give to clients moving from blogger to wordpress. drop me an email and i’ll send you the link to the download and access to one of my subdomains that i use for testing and you can try it out yourself. and did you read my post about why you should get your ass off the free platform? about blogs that go poof!
you own your domain, those people didn’t move their blog the RIGHT WAY, that’s why they lost everything
You are a serious bit of coolness, Ms.Gorgeous. I went over and read your post. Two things: 1/ you make it sound easy 2/i’d be happy to “work something out” with you because you sound damn convincing. (and also because I am partial to mompreneurs)
I was going through your vanitacyril.com site and found to my surprise all the posts lead back here. Neat. I’d like to do that with my other two blogs when I make my move. Did I just say “when” and not “if”? My eyes just went in static concentric circles just thinking about that.
See, Vanita, my blog’s going to be ten years old in June
(yes!, i started in 2003); and my domain name comes up for renewal in June too. (Thank God I had the sense to get a domain at least eh?) So – what do you say we team up and do the do? 
Be kind to me. Because while I am one heck of a :”don’t worry, I’ll take care of it” about almost everything for every one I know, this Blogger-to-self-hosted is my bete noire. Let me know. Ya know my email. If inclined, we can chat on gmail chat (if you use gmail that is).
Thank you for everything so far
Vidya Sury recently posted..An Interview At BlogAdda
Vidya, the transfer can be a huge pain in the ass and if you wanted to do the move yourself, i’d be happy to help you out with support by email, but if you’d like me to take it off your hands, i can do that too and work out the cost with you. i’m partial to my fellow mom bloggers
lol you visited vanitacyril.com right after i redirected the few posts. that was once my biz site and it’s time to merge it with another site and make it the biz site again. this way i’m down to two blogs. it will be a bloody relief i tell you.
OMG 10 years? i’ll email you and go over hosting and the things you’d need to do. no worries girl.
exactly the mind-space i found myself in some months back
very well articulated post
camehere thru Umashankar’s RT of your post link. m glad i came over. enjoyed the read
sujatha sathya recently posted..Looking Young
Sujatha thanks for stopping by girl. i love meeting new bloggers and i’m so glad you left a comment so i can find your blog. only about 5% of my visitors leave comments and i’m grateful that others are reading, but it’s always nicer to know who’s reading so i can visit their blogs. I think all of us at some point have found ourselves in this same spot. me being the big mouth i am had to voice it. lol
I’m with you 100%! I love Allison. I tried to comment on that same post yesterday but my phone was being annoying. You have many valid points. I read lots of blogs and I’m trying to comment more, especially on smaller Blogs with less comments. Everyone likes to know they’re being read and (I would hope) enjoys the interaction with their readers. Personally I don’t get slot of traffic and I’m i’m with that since it’s been hard to post lately and my computer is fritzing constantly. However, I have to commit to being more timely with my replies.
Have a great weekend!!
Bee recently posted..Guilty Pleasure Popcorn
Bee! girl how are ya’? i’ve missed you on twitter! thanks so much for stopping by. i loved your post about the cats. we don’t have any, but we do have parakeets that tempt me to open the window and open the cage. gosh they are noisy! i have that same issue with my phone! i can’t even respond to my own comments unless i’m at my desk!
AMEN!
The only reason I’ll comment on a “big blog” is to get the backlink and/or hope of traffic from people reading the info I post in the comment. Unless it’s a friends “big blog”. However, I can’t remember the last time I even checked back to see if a comment was answered. It’s pretty amazing how many blogs don’t have a button so you get notice of a reply. Like here, I get it right away, love that!
Now I’m definitely NOT a big blogger but been blogging for eons. Over 10 years now. I always go check out blogs that comment and I try to find at least one post that I can leave a good comment on. I hate when I can’t find one but I won’t just leave a spammy comment for the sake of returning a comment. If they are good enough they get added to my feedreader. I mean obviously they are in my niche so why not keep visiting them? They did some of the work for me by finding me
Val recently posted..Can You Really Make Money Blogging?
actually, i have the ReplyMe plugin installed, and it surprises me how many don’t, so when i reply to you, you’ll get the response by email, whether you check that box or not.
After I read your reply it dawned on me I’m probably guilty on some of my newer ones. Get so excited to set them up that I don’t have a checklist. BAD, bad, bad of me. Thanks for your plugin recommendation. Off to go see which one’s don’t have anything. (hangs head in shame)
Val recently posted..Three Powerful Ways To Turn Ideas Into Action
lol hahaha oops sorry
By the sheer number of comments, you also seem to be falling in the category of ‘Big blogs’ but I will still leave a comment.
I completely agree with you, it hurts when you get no reply… but I have seen during my commenting, people do tend to reply, well mostly… and I must say, a rocking post…
Jas recently posted..Don’t Die On Me
ha! Jas, i think this post just happen to hit a chord with everyone. also, since all my responses are counted in too! thanks for stopping by. i love your blog. the army wife story may be fiction, but seems all too much like real life. Dear Granpa was also wonderful, made me think of my paternal grandfather, probably the only grandparent that did like me. lol. he died when i was 7 or 8. being the only grandparent who was happy that my parents married, he was the only one who didn’t look down on me as if i was an abomination.i’m so glad you left a comment to lead me to your blog. thank you.
Thanks for the appreciation Vanita… Loved that you not only read the latest post but also the previous one…
Hope to see you around more often…:)
Jas, if my schedule wasn’t so tight i would have read more! will definitely be back!
I still comment on {some} big blogs, but only if the post really moves me to do so. I don’t expect a response, but it’s nice when/if I get one.
My blog is NOT big at all.
So I try to respond to every comment. I don’t do it right away, but I take at least one day a week and tackle them all. I have a plug-in installed that should be emailing the commenters when I respond, but hell if I know if the thing really works or not. I hope it does.
I’m blogging to make friends, so why wouldn’t I answer the people who took time to say “hi” you know?
Ronni recently posted..Cray Cray
Ronni, thanks for stopping by girl. i went to your blog and it’s awesome! sent you email cause i couldn’t comment. i absolutely agree with your comment girl. well, of course you see that. lol. it’s crazy how some bloggers take readers for granted.
I figured it was probably a plug-in that I’d installed today. It was supposed to keep bots out, not people, but it seems that it hasn’t figured out the difference. So I deleted it! Thank you for emailing and letting me know and also, thank you for coming by to visit my blog!
I hope you come by to comment again, and that it’s successful for you this time. (I did test it and it seems to be OK now.)
Ronni recently posted..Cray Cray
i will definitely be back girl! i’ve got to finish rearranging the blog at the moment. just merged another blog with this one and things are pretty much EVERYWHERE. lol. But i will be back soon!
I just heart you. needed to comment it
Adriana recently posted..About Rabbit Holes…
lol ditto girl! big hugs
I am sad that I missed this post! I’ve been so…offline lately. But you’re right- It’s disheartening to comment on a blog (like really comment and put effort into a comment) and get nothing in response. I have had that happen to me in the past, and while it won’t stop me from reading, it may deter me from always making an effort to comment. I am just now making an effort to respond to every single comment (no matter when I get it) on my blog. I was just commenting on comments made within 48 hours of a post being up just because it seemed to overwhelming to do all of them. But, I changed recently. While very busy in my own life, I know that everyone who bothers to say something in response to something I’ve written is busy, too. We’re all busy. So, I’ve been doing better. You can tell, right?
Jessica recently posted..Spring Cleaning| Teething Baby
yes i can tell and i know what you’re saying. life gets super busy and it’s hard to keep up. i think this is why i still can’t bring myself to post everyday. lol
Very interesting “discussion” about commenting! I have wondered about these things… I had a good comment I wrote get lost or not published and I was bummed because I had created a mini recommendation list of books. I never put that much thought into comments anymore without copying it to my computer first (maybe a future post idea).
Ann recently posted..All Signs Point to Fun!
Ann, I’m sorry you got burned girl. Sucks, doesn’t? i understand that some comments just go poof. technology isn’t perfect. but i’ve left comments that weren’t held for moderation, that were showing on the site before i moved on, and have returned days later to see if there was a response, to find the comment gone. now that’s just wrong.
I really do try to respond to everyone who comments on my site, regardless of who they are because I appreciate their time and opinion-I’m sure I would feel the same if I had a “BIG” blog or the tiniest blog this side of the WWW, because you’re right; blogs would be nothing without their audience.
I understand though if bloggers behind the blogs don’t have time now and again, but at least give the effort.
I’ve also found commenting is a fabulous way of getting more followers-it’s as simple as give and you shall receive in return
Kayla recently posted..Are YOU Brave Enough?
Kayla! i always have to smile when i see your name in the comments. you’ve always been a pretty damn good host on your blog, i can tell you that for sure! and thanks so much for keeping my badge in the sidebar. i truly appreciate it. i love when people leave comments, but not for the comment count, but because i love the interaction and that i have a way to find them through the commentluv and connect. it’s a wonderful thing.
Vanita recently posted..Stop Marketers From Pissing On Your Blog
I always mean to respond to all my commenters’ comments but sometimes I am slow and a few times, I accidentally deleted a valid comment that went to my Askimet spam box. Sorry! It’s just that if you get lots of spam comments every day, it’s hard to check all of them. Usually Askimet is pretty accurate.
Your post makes me realize that I need to respond faster to my comments. I shall!
PragmaticMom recently posted..Friday Find: Pedometer to Teach Kids Math and Fitness
girl, it really doesn’t have to be right away, but it really pisses me off when other comments that came after mine are answered and mine is ignored or just disappears. It would be so much easier if WP had a built in reply system. Then we’d all get replies to comments we’ve made and would not have to keep checking when waiting for an answer to a legitimate question. I use the Reply Me plugin so commenters will receive my response without having to check back or subscribe
What if you can’t reply to every comment? I’m a busy homeschooling mom of 5 (#6 in utero) and most days if I get to work on my blog it’s to do a post. How do you make time? I try really really hard to answer questions on my Facebook page so they don’t feel ignored.
Autumn, I have 4 kids and work full time from home without any assistance, whether it be a virtual assistant or a sitter. Two of those kids are toddlers. Sometimes I don’t get to the comments that day, but eventually I answer each comment. This is another reason I don’t blog everyday, I’m not sure I could keep up with responding to 5 days worth of posts – ya know, if people actually comment on them. LOL. The free WordPress plugin REplyMe has been a great help. It emails readers my reply so they don’t need to check in. As a matter of fact, i think I should note that somewhere prominently near the comments section. My biggest issue is when i take the time to leave a comment or when I ask a question about the post, and my comment is ignored. Or disappears – even though I saw it publish. building your blog’s community on facebook is a great alternative. I try to build mine here on the blog. different strokes and all that. btw, i love your blog.great color scheme and love the sidebar.
Thanks for the reply and kind words! I feel so loved
Girl I wish I knew about your blog when my kids were infants. now i can’t get them out of diapers fast enough. one more to go!
Woo! A topic I’m super passionate about!
Fame, A-Listers, community + conversation.
I’ll leave this food for thought — is anything Truly Given, if we’re attached/expecting something back… like a ‘response’ ?
P.S. I wrote a two part series on commenting like a boss. I write comments that regularly get me invited personally by the “big blogs” to guest post, if it helps you or your readers, you can check it out here: http://www.logallot.com/holy-grail-praise-worthy-comments-1/
Jason “J-Ryze” Fonceca recently posted..Vanilla Or Kinky – A Look At Joint Ventures
Jason, when i take the time to post a comment, to carry on the conversation and give the blogger an answer to the question they asked in the post, and then go even further to ask a question of that blogger, yes, i expect an answer. if i leave a comment just so that blogger knows that i found their post interesting and i agree with them, then no i don’t expect a response, though i do appreciate when they do respond. any which way, i don’t expect that blogger to visit my blog, i don’t expect them to comment on one of my posts – THAT would be commenting expecting something in return. I solely commented because i enjoyed the post and had something to say or wanted to show support to that blogger. And if I ask a question of a colleague who “says they’re there to help”, yes I expect a response, because I would help if asked. If you’re not willing to answer a reader’s question, don’t promote that you’re “there” for your readers. That’s just bullshit.
and i did read your post, it’s how we met, and i agreed with your post because it’s the way i try to comment when applicable. considering my choice of blogs, it’s not always applicable.
what pisses me off most, is when i leave a comment, genuinely trying to help another reader and asking the blogger’s take on it, see my comment published and then return to find that it’s gone and find that the blogger has responded to that same reader with my response, that bloody ticks me off.
I give my time freely to those who appreciate it and every comment i write is an investment of my time.
O M G
lol
<– Jason is scared to continue discussion
Jason “J-Ryze” Fonceca recently posted..Vanilla Or Kinky – A Look At Joint Ventures
lmao. don’t be. i just happen to be really passionate about commenting too. and about fairness. and about appreciating others.
Well… good. Those are good things to be passionate about.
When I ask an insightful, deep question like: “can something be Truly Given when there’s expectation involved?”
I was kinda hoping for a “yes, XXX” or “no, XXX” or maybe even a “Jason, remember your post on giving here? XXX.”
Clearly… I got *something different than I expected*
Assume nothing dear Jason. hahahaha